Ordinarily Your Mama sticks to who is buying and selling the real estate. However, this morning we awoke to an email from Mister Malibu who informed us that pin-up princess Pam Anderson is selling everything but the real estate (which in this case she does not own). That’s right children, the woman who’s made a very good living strutting her behemoth breasts around to anywhere and everywhere there might be a camera is having a gargantuan garage sale at the Malee-boo mansion she’s been leasing since last year up on Morning View Drive. According to the pink website set up for the sale, “She’s selling everything!”
And hunnies, everything means everything including the damn kitchen sink. We got 5,000 square feet of vintage country French furniture, faux-aged clay pots, designer doo-dads and depression glass, jeans and jewelry, lamps of all sorts, scooters and skateboards, dozens of white slip covered sofas, baskets full of shells and silver, shoos, tools, off-road equipment, a new Jacuzzi tub, a six passenger electric car and, yes children, a full kitchen.
Security will be be tight tight tight–and Your Mama imagines Miss Pam unlikely to be there–so don’t any-bahdee hop in your hoopdies and head out to Malee-boo and act stoopid.
Doors open at 7am. No early birds. Did you hear that all you yard sale queens who typically show up to these things at the crack of dawn with wads of cash wearing matching and brightly colored windbreakers? No. Early. Birds.
photo: Helping Hand Estate Sale Service