Although Your Mama would like the children to think we are a wise and omniscient wizard of celebrity real estate, the truth is what we do know is far less than what we don’t know. For example…
For weeks now rumors have been swirling and swelling that maybe she’s pregnant, maybe she’s not Mariah Carey made an offer on on Fleur de Lys, the freakishly opulent mega-mansion in the Holmby Hills area of Los Angeles currently owned by couture queen Suzanne Saperstein and listed for sale with a pee your pants from shock and awe asking price of $125,000,000.
As soon as that bit of gossip began to slip and slide down grapevine Your Mama got on the horn with a few of the folks we thought might actually have some knowledge of Mister and Missus Carey’s real estate bizness. The always well informed Donna Tellaitall snitched that the newlyweds had been peeping and poking around some of the more expensive zip codes in the San Fernando Valley for homes in the ten million dollar range. Although we cannot confirm this, it is our understanding the couple had a look-see around a recently re-habbed residence in Encino which had previously belonged to glassy eyed and gravel voiced chanteuse Macy Gray.
Another of our regular bean spillers scoffed and hissed at the very notion that Mariah Carey could even afford a house of Fleur de Lys‘ magnitude. Of course, even though Your Mama don’t know nuthin‘ from bacon about Mrs. Carey’s finances, we too confess it required a bit of mental stretching to get our gin soaked mind around that idea ourselves.
Our next query went out to Virginia Slim who is kind of like our Fleur de Lys Deep Throat given that she actually fraternizes with Miz Saperstein and her coterie of younger man friends. Miss Slim whispered that she heard from someone in a position to know that Mister and Missus Carey did tour the mammoth manse but as far as she could suss out, no offer was proffered.
Shortly after speaking to Miss Slim we heard from Donna Tellaitall again who whispered in our big ol’ ear that she’d heard the house hunters had signed on the dotted line for an approximately $12,000,000 property in Bel Air that was definitely not Fleur de Lys and that’s all she knew. Mister Carey recently confirmed the couple did indeed purchase a place in L.A., but not surprisingly clammed up like Fort Knox when it came to the details.
So once again we put the feelers out for the 411 in order to figure out which fancy house to which the couple cottoned and have come up empty handed.
Because we know deep in our compromised soul that at least two of the children have got the skinny we want, we’re going to do something we’ve never done before…ask the children what’s what. So spill it. No one but Your Mama has to know who you are.