SELLER: Barry Manilow
LOCATION: Malibu Road, Malibu, CA
SIZE: 3,546 square feet, 4 bedrooms, 3.5 bathrooms
DESCRIPTION: Prime Malibu Rd location on dry, sandy beach. Stunning Contemporary compound with large courtyard garden entry. Expansive coastline views north and south. Two-story living room with fireplace, floor to ceiling ocean view glass. Media/family room, master wing with fireplace and terrace. Separate guest house with kitchen.
YOUR MAMAS NOTES: A week or two ago we received a covert communique from Malee-boo Barbee who tattled to Your Mama that music legend Barry Manilow listed his ocean front house in Malee-boo with an asking price of $10,900,000. A bit of research shows that the Malibu Road property has actually been on the market for more than four months already and was first listed at $12,600,000.
After getting the 411 from Malee-boo Barbee, Your Mama’s big ears pricked right up because even though we can hardly bear to look at Mister Manilow with his frosted and spikey hair-don’ts, we have a soft spot in our cold and dark heart for the singer/songwriter/arranger/producer/conductor/American Idol guest artist.
See puppies, back when Your Mama was just an innocent (and thin) little lamb we would visit our high-lariously foul-mouthed Auntie Jennie who had this colossal console stereo in her living room that sat between two orange faux-velveteen swivel chairs. Come early evening, our Auntie Jennie and Your Mama’s Momma would pile their hair up on their heads, strap on their high heels and head out to the Fern Bar leaving Your Mama, Sister Woman, Toddaroohoo and Cuzzin Lois with Teena the Teenage Baby-Sitter who would more often than not leave us home alone so that she could go out on a date with some muscle car driving stud with feathered hair and an impressive looking package in his painted on jeans. After all us scrappy kids gobbled up some Frosted Flakes for dinner, we’d fire up that console stereo, slide in an 8-track tape and do us some fierce karaoke performances to songs by 1970s icons like Wayne Newton, Helen Reddy and, natch, Mister Barry Manilow.
Whether y’all care for his music or not, Mister Manilow is a song singing superstar who howled out a string of hit songs like Mandy, I Write the Songs and Copacabana, all of which are on regular rotation on our iPod.
Anyhoo, we confess we weren’t sure whether to believe Malee-boo Barbee’s information, not because he has ever steered us in the wrong celebrity real estate direction but because while property records all point towards Mister Manilow and his long time manager (and oft alleged man-mate) Garry Kief, they do not actually show his name. We quickly got on the horn with a couple of Your Mama’s impossibly well connected informants who both swore up and down that the property in question is indeed owned by Mister Barry Manilow.
Property records show the glassy, three-story contemporary crib was bought in August of 2002 for an undisclosed amount of money. However, with a leg up by Babbling Babette Your Mama was able to suss out that Mister Manilow paid $3,850,000 for the ocean front property which includes 4 bedrooms and 3.5 bathrooms in the ocean side main house and another bedroom in the street side guest house where we have to assume there is another terlit because we simply do not believe Mister Manilow would force his over-night guests to dash across the courtyard and into the main house just to take a late night dump.
The front facade of the walled, gated and secured property includes a stainless steel garage door and entry gate both which look very impressive and expensive but would surely drive our entirely too volatile house gurl Svetlana to hysterics trying to keep that shit shiny and finger print free.
The 3,546 square foot house is separated from the road by a quiet courtyard between the main and guest houses. A courtyard like this is crucial in a seaside house because when the wind gets a-blowin’ it’s murder on wig wearers and soft talkers. A glass and stainless steel front door that looks like the entrance to a damn Saks Fifth Avenue opens to a two-story, step-down living room with polished stone floors, a fireplace, a tall wall of windows looking out over the Pacific Ocean and French doors that open to ocean side terraces with undeniably spectacular sunset views. The house also includes, according to listing information, a media/family room, office, a kitchen with high-grade appliances and upstairs the master suite includes two-walk in closets, a fireplace, a big bathroom with spa tub and steam shower and a private glass paneled terrace hanging over rugged coastline.
Listing information does not currently include any photos of the interior but Nameless Nancy, who claims to have been up in Mister Manilow’s Malee-boo pad, hissed to Your Mama that it’s, “gold records everywhere like some tired queen’s Palm Springs hideaway.” Now kittens, we don’t really know if Nancy’s assessment of the day-core is accurate but since Mister Manilow is indeed a tired queen with highlighted hair and a slew of gold records who lives primarily in a sprawling hillside house in Palm Springs it is a believable, if dee-lishusly catty, description.
Now then, hold on to yer britches children because we’re quite sure we’re about to receive a mountain of hate mail from a well organized cabal of Miz Manilow’s over-fervent fans who will read Your Mama the riot act and scream like banshees about how we should leave Mister Manilow alone because he is a great artist and loving man. However, before you freaky Fanilow people start sending us angry email and clogging up our comment box with your righteous indignation, please keep in mind that Your Mama and the Dr. Cooter both love us some Mister Barry Manilow. We just think he needs a new beautician.