Before we get started with this little tale, take a look at the house above and try to block out the title of this post. Now, can you guess where in LA this structure is located? Let’s see: big spec-built three-story modern mansion, ultra-sloped hillside lot, house situated hard-up on the street. It’s gotta be somewhere in the Hollywood Hills, right? The Bird Streets? It’s certainly the most logical guess.
But nope. This particular pad actually squats in Brentwood. Yes, that Brentwood. The land of young families, Range Rover-driving soccer moms, the Brentwood Country Mart, and 1,000 juice bars. And the house overlooks bucolic Mandeville Canyon, home to many horsies and ranches (and Dr. Dre).
Anyway, the somewhat atypical-for-the-neighborhood residence was sold just recently for $6,150,000 to a mysterious LLC with a Miami, FL address. Snoopy ol’ Yolanda just had to know who the buyer was, of course. Eventually we uncovered his identity: a guy named Luol Deng.
Since we are somewhat ignorant when it comes to professional sports, we had to google our Mr. Deng. We quickly discovered — as y’all probably already know — that he’s a very big deal in the world of professional basketball. FYI, the 6’9″ 31-year-old was born and raised in the African country of Sudan and has an older brother who is currently a professional basketball player in the UK.
And he’s got quite the big, toothy grin.
As it turns out, Mr. Deng — who has played for the Chicago Bulls, Cleveland Cavaliers, and most recently the Miami Heat — just signed quite the mega-contract with our very own much-maligned Los Angeles Lakers. At a whopping $72,000,000 (yes, kiddies, $72 million smackers to dribble, shoot, and score), Mr. Deng’s four-year contract makes him his new team’s highest-paid player. Easily.
We’re sure all that money’s nice, but talk about pressure! Right?!
It appears Mr. Deng may have faced some competition for the house, as the sale price is a full $155,000 more than the last ask of $5,995,000. The 1.19 acre lot is certainly commodious — on paper. But like Yolanda said, the slope here is significant so there ain’t no front yard and backyard space is limited to a small patch of grass, a pool w/ wooden deck, and a second wooden deck just below.
Reclaimed oak (?) hardwood floors line most of the living spaces inside the 6,518-square-foot home. A sizable living room seamlessly connects to the petite backyard via fancy-schmancy La Cantina folding glass doors.
The kitchen has all the expected high-end Wolf and Subzero appliances. We like the wood cabinetry that decorates most of the room, although we wonder if it might look better were it stained a darker color to contrast with the floors. Just Yolanda’s useless idea, folks.
A wood-and-glass front door leads to a proper entrance foyer with a massive crystal chandelier and a three-story staircase with wooden stairs. We can’t imagine a professional athlete like Mr. Deng would ever dream of using it, but there’s also an elevator for any lazy ass houseguests he may have over.
Check out the moonwalkin’ Martian on the second floor landing. Seriously, what’s up with that?
The master suite is located on the second floor and features disappearing walls of glass with views to Mandeville Canyon. A suspended fireplace heats up those rare chilly LA nights (like tonight). The master bath isn’t as large as Yolanda would’ve thought for a 6,500+ square foot house, but it’s got the requisite soaking tub and glass-walled shower with rainfall showerhead. Perfect for washing the stress (and sweat) of a particularly fierce basketball game off.
In addition to the master suite, the house features 6 additional bedrooms and a total of 6.25 more bathrooms (3 full, 2 three-quarter, 3 half, and 1 one-quarter. Goodness, crappers take up about half the living space!).
The third floor is primed for parties with a media room and party-sized 1,000-square-foot outdoor terrace/lounge with fireplace.
The wood on the separate outdoor decks appears to be teak, but don’t quote Yolanda on that.
Other celebrity residents of the same general area (Mandeville Canyon) include the aforementioned Dr. Dre, Jordana Brewster, Gwyneth Paltrow, Harrison Ford, Trent Reznor, Beck, and Ari Emanuel.
But we digress. Our friends at The Real Deal reported that in September 2014 — during the dawn of his short-lived Miami Heat career — Mr. Deng paid $4,600,000 for a waterfront home in the city’s Morningside area. As far as Yolanda knows (and that ain’t much), Mr. Deng continues to own this property.
Finally, Yolanda hopes and prays that Mr. Deng’s $72 million contract was a wise investment that will catapult our long-suffering Lakers back to the top of the charts or rankings or whatever.
We worry, though. Mr. Deng’s choice of homes is concerning! Brentwood has a slow pace of life. All that OJ stuff was ages ago. Now it’s Will our Mr. Deng turn into a Soulcyclin’, kid-schleppin’, kale sippin’ vegan earth mom?! Say it ain’t so!
Naw. Lebron lives there too, right? So we shouldn’t worry. Yet.
Listing agent: Santiago Arana, The Agency
Mr. Deng’s agent: Gillian Bland, Gibson International